It seems like we go through life with all kinds of highs and lows, and then there are those moments that are "Real Highs" and "Real Lows". I'm not talking necessarily about devastation, just things all out of sync.
We are far away from family and friends, so I have always wanted to move back closer. Recently we started looking, however, price is going to be a real problem. The area we want to move back to is very expensive. Prices have totally soared and are almost out of reach.
When we sold our previous home we bought this one in a hurry since we had a short closing date. I have never liked the far north west side of town. Now don't get me wrong, it is a very nice area of all new homes, just far away from everything. It is a 40 minute drive to the nearest Mall area and the same distance to a freeway to get anywhere you want to go. We do have Walmart, Target, a small Kohl's, Michaels and basic shopping with several grocery stores and drug stores. It's a 1 1/2 hour drive to see family & friends and some of my friends live over 2 1/2 hours away. Downtown takes about 1 1/2 hours too. That doesn't seem like much, but when you are having to fight tons of freeway traffic going about 70 to 80 mph. (yes, they do go that fast), it is very stressful.
I have struggled with living in this home for a long time. I spent the first two years not even trying to fix it up. It is much smaller than my previous homes and definitely builder basic. . Buying this home in this area was a mistake and has been hard to turn into a positive. I kept thinking we would sell this one and move again, but that didn't happen. That was about the time the market went crazy and housing prices soared. Then the crash came and I kept thinking maybe prices would go lower. Finally I decided I was being a really spoiled brat and I should be grateful for this wonderful home, so I have been determined to make it a place that is "mine" and shows love. It has turned into a very comfortable home and one that I am proud of. It just proves that a little tlc can make a house a home without tons of money.
After only a couple of weeks of looking for a home in my preferred area, I find myself anxious and up-tight. Not at all good things. We don't have to move, it is just a want and there are no time tables as to when we move. It could be now or next year or maybe never.
Looking to see what is available has become somewhat disturbing. I have found myself depressed at what is in our price range and what is available in general. This was supposed to be a great thing. To make this move back close to family and friends was supposed to be so exciting.
Last week when I was really, really thinking about all of this, it suddenly dawned on me that I needed to "Turn It Over To God". If this is meant to be, the right home will become available. If not, then He has provided a beautiful home for use to live in. I need to stop struggling with this and looking so hard. For years I have loved the motto - --"LET GO AND LET GOD". That is exactly what I need to do.
Sometimes we just need to stop, relax and let God do His thing. After all, He already knows what's going to happen and He'll guide us in His timing, not mine.
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